3 Ways 3D Movies Will Ruin Your Life

27 01 2010

The hottest thing in Hollywood right now?  3D.  As in three-dimensional.  As in Avatar.  Sure, movies before Avatar have dabbled with new 3D technology.  Mostly kids movies, like Up, Monsters Vs. Aliens, G-Force, Bolt, etc.  But not until Avatar dominated the box office have studios taken a second look, considering 3D technology for films other than animated kids’ fare.

In recent news, Warner Bros. has pushed back the release of Clash of the Titans a week in order to convert the film into 3D (apparently, for a measly $5 million).  And, in an even bolder move, the same studio is planning to release the two-part Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in 3D as well.  Now, everyone is considering a 3D conversion.  Crank 3D, Transformers 3D (it’s nice how third installments can work “3D” so cleverly into the title), maybe The Hobbit 3D?  Iron Man 3D?  Spider-Man Reboot 3D?  It seems like no new film announcement is complete without the producer or director saying, “We’re looking to see if 3D technology is something that will benefit this film,” which is really code for “can it make us s*loads of money?”  And with the success of Avatar, the answer is a resounding yes.  Studios are even going back into their vaults and considering re-releasing films in a 3D format (Star Wars currently has the most 3D buzz).

Even television is dipping its proverbial toe into the 3D pool.  One of the hottest gadgets at this year’s CES tradeshow was 3D TV technology.  Is it practical?  Not yet, but if the film industry is any indication, this could quickly change.

So what’s the danger?  Who cares if every movie is made in 3D?  You should care, because 3D movies:

  • Will make you poor: Studios and movie theatres seem to think that 3D is way better than 2D, so much so, that they will charge you an extra couple of bucks just to bear witness to the awesomeness that is 3D.  Now, instead of a $15-$20 date night, you’re looking at $25-$30…that adds up.  You might even be forced to choose between your daily half-caff, soy, 2 pump vanilla, quad latte-chinno and a night out at the movies. *gasp*
  • Will cause you to lose your grip on reality: With 3D technology becoming so advanced, audiences won’t be able to distinguish between the real world and the 3D fantasy lands on the screen.  This is already happening with the crazies who think Pandora is real and want to commit suicide in hopes they will be reincarnated in an Avatar body.  With the prevalence of 3D, the real world will become dull, colors will become muted, and you’ll go about your day disappointed that giant things aren’t popping out at you.
  • Will leave a gaping hole in your life once the fad ends: Once we start seeing chick-flicks, romantic comedies, period dramas and bio-pics in 3D, we’ll know the end of 3D is near.  Once the fad fades, what will we have to replace it?  We can’t go back to 2D…we’ll have been too spoiled.  4D?  We’ll be lost.

So, you see, 3D movies will ruin our lives.

While I think 3D has benefits, I don’t think studios are thinking clearly.  Avatar didn’t make all the money it did just because it’s in 3D.  It has amazing visual effects, a solid story, great directing, a sweeping score…in essence, it’s a good movie…that also happens to be in 3D.  I think 3D technology will encourage the movie-making industry to think outside the box, think of new ways to entertain audiences.  Because of that, there will always be something new…3D is here, but its stay is limited.

What do you think?  Is 3D a passing fad?  Are you willing to pay more for a 3D movie?  Share your thoughts in the comments!

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6 responses

28 01 2010
rogue

This is the worst story of all time… Besides the fact that 3D movies are taking a toll on your wallet, I don’t think anyone will be killing themselves over a 3D movie anytime soon, If someone does, they have some serious mental issues and need help. That just sounds absurd. It’s just a different format for movies for crying out loud. We already live in 3D so we already see things popping out at us smart one.

I hope this was just a joke

28 01 2010
Dustin

Yes, this was post was meant to be tongue-in-cheek; it wasn’t meant to be taken so literally. As far as people committing suicide over 3D movies – I was refering to the “Avatar-blues” phenomenon (you can read more about it here from CNN.com – http://www.cnn.com/2010/SHOWBIZ/Movies/01/11/avatar.movie.blues/index.html ). Just trying to make light of all the hype. And yes, we live in a 3D world – my cat pops out at me all the time.

28 01 2010
Susy Q

Of course it was a joke…smart one.

28 01 2010
rogue

Yeah I was reading some of these quotes, and it’s really kinda sad. I really think that when people are depressed enough as it is, a movie like this just sets them off. So much so that when they go and see a really badass movie like this, that’s all they can think about is being in some fantasy world away from reality wishing they could lead that kind of life. I mean I’ll admit when I was young young, I wanted Star Wars to be like real life but, I mean, didn’t we all? There’s just a point where it just get unhealthy like these comments below:

“Ever since I went to see ‘Avatar’ I have been depressed. Watching the wonderful world of Pandora and all the Na’vi made me want to be one of them. I can’t stop thinking about all the things that happened in the film and all of the tears and shivers I got from it,” Mike posted. “I even contemplate suicide thinking that if I do it I will be rebirthed in a world similar to Pandora and the everything is the same as in ‘Avatar.’ ”

“When I woke up this morning after watching Avatar for the first time yesterday, the world seemed … gray. It was like my whole life, everything I’ve done and worked for, lost its meaning,” Hill wrote on the forum. “It just seems so … meaningless. I still don’t really see any reason to keep … doing things at all. I live in a dying world.”

30 01 2010
Karren

I think the article is funny! I agree with everything written. After 3D fades – movies will be boring. I don’t mind paying the extra money to see a movie in 3D – within reason, but the more advanced the 3D special effects get, the more money the theaters will charge. I am NOT willing to pay any more than they are charging currently. If the price goes up too much – I think people will choose to see the cheaper 2D movie and the enire 3D plan will backfire!

1 02 2010
Dustin

Yeah, but what if EVERY movie is in 3D and we don’t have a choice?! It’ll be interesting to see what happens. I wonder if it will be like the DVD vs Blu-ray thing…I’m not willing to pay more for Blu-ray (right now), but what if everything transitions to Blu-ray and I’m forced to go with the flow? I guess we’ll see! 🙂
Thanks for the comment!

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